With apologies to both Tolkien and Richmal Crompton
One day when walking with Eldarion, Aragorn was surprised to come across a strangely dressed little girl with blonde curls.
“Would you like to play?” Eldarion asked.
“Go away, nasthy rude boy!” lisped the girl. “I’m Violet Elizabeth Bott and my Daddy is very important. He makes Bott’s Digestive Sauce.”
“What is that?” asked a puzzled Aragorn.
“You nasthy man. I’ll thream and I’ll thream and I’ll thream till I’m thick!” said the little girl opening her mouth and emitting a piercing wail.
“And I, young lady, am the King!” Aragorn said sternly.
Violet Elizabeth was finally stunned into silence.